Neli kuud olen nüüd Twitteris jauranud ja mõtlesin, et vaatan kõik need 2245 säutsu läbi ja kopin valiku kokku. See on rohkem mu enda jaoks, et kunagi hea lugeda, aga kui kedagi huvitab ja jaksab läbi lugeda, siis siin.
See muidu on esimene katse varbaga vett katsuda, et kuidas see blogimaailm tänapäeval ka tundub.
Used self-tanning lotion yesterday. Today: have zebra-legs.
@Birxu Dude. Acting your age is so last spring.
Fat cat is snoring like there’s no tomorrow.
R. finally arrived. Now we have not only spaghettis but few pounds of frankfurters also. Planning a fast.
Paranoias attacking… Twitter makes me feel like I AM THE SPAM.
Went shopping, bought wine, drinking wine, going out soon. Cats seem to be suspicious.
Istusin taksosse ja juba kodulaul käis. Vihje?
Things I want my daughter to know: please, always wash off your make-up. Always, no matter how drunk or tired you are. Always.
My cat just tried to eat a cactus. Failed.
From the author, Birk Rohelend: The best love is unhappy one – it doesn’t come to live with you.
@aabram mida ma kindlasti ei oodanud, oli see jube ilmutus katrin saksi seljas. ta nägi välja nagu emo, keda on rünnanud kunstnahk.
I miss gym so much I just powerwalked to the kitchen and back.
Cleaned EVERYthing. Even the place behind my kitchen counter where I suspect parallel universe starts. Feel like ice-cream and beer now.
My left eye just turned blind. I CAN’T SEE!
Oh, yeah, sorry, I forgot to open it.
Why don’t they sell blue or red toilet paper?
Things I should do: get dressed, start moving. Things I don’t wanna do: get dressed, start moving.
I have red socks with ladybirds on them on today.
Something smells like acetone. OMG. Am I leaking acetone?! Can’t find a source, but it’s killing me!
I just discovered the source of acetone – my cheap wine smells like that. I’m not drinking that any more, thank you very much, Säästumarket.
Ugh. So cold! Considering a new career as a bipolarbear.
I think I’m at the beginning of my menopause. At last. Hot and cold waves coming and going.
@Birxu And think that I’m off meds… Just discovered that nothing damages my ability to spill coffee to the keyboard though…
Coffee not from glass but iced coffee from tetra-pac.
Which I was drinking with a freaking STRAW!
Doing maths w/ @Birxu to figure out how much Jaegermeister we drank yesterday “to get warm”.
R just asked why it’s called “menopause”. Because pause indicates that it’ll be over some day.
Just had to set my content filter in Stumbleupon to r-rated, because one of my friends has r-rated. Things you do for friendship…
Dead as… the Latvian money.
Good morning, my little weasels of horror.
I miss pillow fights with my sister. And jumping on a bed without being afraid that it’ll break.
Orkut is filled with underage people. And I’m only trying to find one of them!
The shroud of Turin has type AB blood stains. I have the same blood type as Jesus Christ.
Back. Tired as a hooker after eleven-some.
I think I should stop tweeting while intoxicated. It’s even hard for myself to understand what was I thinking while tweeting.
TUI – tweeting under influence
Off to bubble bath now:) Oh, such heaven is to be me sometimes.
House: “It is kinda fun, watching you torture yourself.” Something @Birxu says to me all the time:D Laughed my ass off.
Haah! @Birxu: “everybody wants to be me… even house.”
I know a guy who can recite one of my books by heart. That’s spooky. And kinda fun.
I should count one day how many “ohmygods” I experience in one day. Seems the world will never stop amaze me.
Have I already told you that I find stretch marks sexy?
According to Mayans world ends on 2012. I won’t even have all my loans payed back by then! Darned.
You know what would be a weird job? Creating smileys for living.
Cats are playing a new game – sliding on a floor with a carpet. Hilarious little bastards.
Do you know Elvis was using toilet at the moment he died?
@JennyDoe I now. These kinds of things are the reason why I always think while dressing: Do you want to be found dead in this underwear?
Hah, I just discovered that on my Twitter photo I look like I have a beard.
(actually, of course, it’s a shadow)
(in case you thought I have a beard. I don’t.)
Back from babysitting. They both were whiny and tired today. And now I’m tired. As a… something after very hard something.
Dudes and dudettes of my house (i.e. Cusack and Miuks)! PLEASE LIGHT A MATCH!!!
Wow, Jenna Jameson had twins. That’s… somewhat disturbing since I can imagine that happening. From conception as far as the birth itself.
I love Lawrence Fishburne in CSI. He’s like big smart cuddly teddy-bear.
Cusack is funny. He’s trying to walk and stretch at the same time. He looks like House.
From CSI: “It’s the truth. Even if it never happened.”
The same way Americans find sauerkraut weird, I find peanut butter weird. I think I’d never eat it voluntarily.
Yes. I just managed to squirt ketchup to my kitchen ceiling.
Bipolarity… Bipolarism…? Whatever. It’s a bitch.
Tracy Jordan: “Sorry it took me so long to answer. I was just thinking how weird it is that we eat birds.”
If you say that you are a designer and your webpage looks like bustyheart.com then it’s really hard to take you seriously.
After three long weeks of bad hair days I eventually have a good hair day. It’s a miracle!
RT @tinafey Somewhere a man named Barack Obama sits on a toilet and thinks the same thing I do: I need to trim my toe nails.
Eating pomelo for the first time. Interesting…
OHMYGOD! Pomelo is definitely my new favorite fruit. Grapefruits and mandarines – stay back in awe!
Shopped for two pomelos and two beers.
Things we are doing at the moment? Watching pics of shirtless Obama and Putin and talking about who will kick who’s ass.
When I’m drunk I feel like Cow from “Cow And Chicken”. This show is hilarious!
Miuks licked my hands while I was sleeping. The only logical conclusion is that she’s planning to eat me.
@Birxu: “Have you seen flying dick?” Me: “…” @Birxu: “Sorry, I’m on random mode.”
Why do people think that when they cross their fingers while saying something that doesn’t count?
My bf is a total nerd. He just said: “Physics is cool.” After I tried to explain him about Rayleigh scattering.
Which means I’m a nerd too. I’m trying to understand why sky and veins are blue.
Trying to write. Story needs some new twists and I’m out of ideas. @Birxu suggested using theme “yoga fart”. Will consider.
One of our favorite quotes at home is: “You’re mixing real life with porn again.”
Really hard to explain to a 3yo why i need Evra patches. She tries to take it off so i’d have a baby. Like – instantly. To her to play w/.
Bought a quacking mug. Scared the hell out of sales-lady.
I sometimes wonder if sex feels different for other people.
Just got weirdest spam:”Principles will help have the resources, hear if you would.”
I found a paper between the pages of Jerome K. Jerome where I had written a long time ago: “I can handle bees!” I wonder what does it mean.
QOTD: I’m different than other women. And by different, I mean better.
Me: “Who’s singing?” R: “U2.” Me: “Youtube?” R: “U2.” Me: “Youtube? Seriously?!”
Someone should make a band called Youtube.
Teate, millest ma surmani tüdinenud olen? Peeter Ojast ja tema ülbitsemisest.
Woke up to drilling and sawing. Swearing and spitting got up. Drilling and sawing stopped. Story of my life.
Woke up to complete silence. Thought for a few seconds that I’m all alone in the world.
Drove again w/ an empty gas tank to get some props from store for tonight’s game night. This shiz is going to end w/ a brain aneurysm.
And by “game night” I mean drinking.
But in general: ouch.
I’m eating sausages. Oh I’m so going to Dieters Hell for this.
Doesn’t Jessica Fletcher ever wonder why she’s attracting so many murders? And does she feel guilty about it?
Our hallway smelled so very nice like roses had barfed out some daffodils.
Am I even allowed to say the word “faboosh” or is it reserved for gays only?
QOTD. 13 (from House): Being drunk doesn’t change who you are, it just reveals it.
I wonder if Lady Gaga has friends that will one time just laugh and ask: “What the hell are you wearing, girl?!”
B was just here and mocked my picture on a name tag. Apparently I have extremely dead eyes on the picture.
“This is weird. Something good is happening.” – “Take a deep breath, I’m sure it’ll pass.” Bones. Classic.
Got my new ID-card yesterday. I haven’t heard my friends laughing so hard for a while now. It seems I look like a corpse on that photo.
I just realized I don’t like forks. I really, really don’t like forks. Maybe there’s an Internet support group I can join.
I drove home and I think I saw a drag queen. When you’d live where I live you’d understand that’s really weird.
Miuks sometimes has a creepy lazy left eye like Paris Hilton does.
RT @god: BTW, What would Jesus tweet? “About to get nailed to this cross bc @pontius being a dick. Wait till he sees me resurrect LOL!”
It’s really hard for me to accept the concept “your life is happening now”. I just can’t believe it will not get better.
“i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.” – http://is.gd/u9LT
I think I can send my laptop to restart with bare powers of my mind.
I would really like to see id-pictures of supermodels. I bet they look as horrendous as do we, the little people.
Wow. I just got an e-mail from Dormeo who apparently wants to sleep with me. I’ll stick to humans, but thanks for offering…. mattress.
So yeah. Sleeping is definitely my thing and beloved hobby.
Note to self: don’t try to wash windows when winds are resembling hurricane Katrina.
I have strange melancholy-connection with an ice-cream spoon.
I just realized something. I’ve never seen Estonian porn. Huh.
Wow, I’m listening to country music. And there’s no gun pointed at my face or anything.
I just saw one hedgehog screaming at the other. Well, that’s one thing to scratch off my Bucket List.
My main problem is that I think that I’m cool. Actually I’m pretty uncool. Kinda like mullets.
New emoticon: 69 |D_O – i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently (http://is.gd/Heqo)
“You just lost you mom. It’s only natural you are so Elmo.” – “Emo.” – “That’s not a word, sweety.” #dollhouse
It’s like my uterus knew I just bought two pregnancy tests yesterday. It was all like: “Let’s show her, girls! SPARTA!!!”
RT @sween: And behind every great woman is a great ninja. Of course you can’t see the ninja. That’s why he’s *great*. Try to keep up, people
There comes a point in every woman’s life when she has to decide: shall I wash my hair today or can I wait till tomorrow?
Ohhoo, Eesti passidele lisanduvad sõrmejäljed. Huvitav, mitu kuritegu nii lahendatud saaks, kui politsei KMAga koostööd hakkaks tegema?
My today’s horoscopes are making me laugh: “a walking reservoir of ideas”? More like walking reservoir of unsolved anger issues.
Today’s newspaper anecdotes, on the other hand, are not making me laugh. They never do. Valdo Jahilo and I are such different people.
Sometimes I think I’d like my milkshake to bring all the boys to the yard. But then again I’d like them to be here for my great personality.
Security cam update: just saw a running midget.
Nice. Just got an e-mail from my bbf with a subject “Booobies”.
If something happened and I ended up in a wheelchair I would tell my home bar to install inclined plane so I could still go to drink there.
Is it bad to use work computer to search the term “reflectoporn”? I’m asking for me.
Seems I’m wallowing so deep in my misery that I don’t have anything witty to say today. Mr T. So here, I tried.
Booty call? – Dude. You don’t even follow my Twitter. (http://bit.ly/3cFZZ
R asked me yesterday, annoyed: “What happened to your attention span?” I was ashamed to answer: “Twitter…”
When someone says in all seriousness “Do not visit this site”, don’t you just wanna, you know, visit the site?
I take great comfort in knowing that my lady-parts look better than Lindsay Lohans.
You know who I absolutely do not care about? Speidi.
Me: “What do you want for your b-day?” Him: “Well, new boots are kind of out of question…”
“You look like Jesus and Patrick Dempsey had a child and that child grew older and then got really sick.” (Royal Pains)
Dirty texting loses its charm when Mom textes you in between.
I just changed my MSN display name to “JOUJOU OLEN DAKI”. Yes, I am retarded.
Cristiano Ronaldo hooked up with Paris Hilton? I’m a) horrified and disappointed, b) surprised he’s not gay.
Fun from spam folder: “I Love you!:) Don’t forget to confirm.” Confirmed, I love you, too.
Things discussed right now via MSN with my bf: “why some men like asses, and other like boobs. The theory.”
Is it weird that ppl who bought stethoscope on Amazon also bought Dexter dvds and nurse scissors? Is it… serial killer w medical fetish?
I can’t say this enough. I hate when men mosh. It is not sexy at all.
How is hangover in Irish? Morning.
I asked that my bf would start calling me Peanut ‘cause FB test said so. And now he does. Adorable.
Went to kitchen, came back, and was startled ‘cause I had already forgotten I rearranged the bedroom yesterday.
Talking to my bf about the possibility of organizing a wet t-shirt competition at home. I have one condition: I should win.
I actually pondered for a while is it humans or humen. Facepalm, that’s what it is.
I feel like I’ve gained like 20 pounds since… yesterday.
If you think about it, House is a really weird last name. Almost like Lamp.
When FB says I have “1 other request” I automatically think it’s a request to ran naked over a bridge screaming: “Spartaaaaa!”
They should name anecdote section in paper anekJokes, since they’re mocking the word anecdote.
Näitab prioriteete. Postimehe esikaas: liuväli raeplatsil, EPLi esikaas: hukkunud sõdur Afganistanis. I say, fail, Postimees.
This is my computer free day. See, it’s going pretty well!
Now that I’ve seen Dolph Lundgren’s penis, my life is complete. I can die in peace.
Oh, no, wait. Add Tori Spelling’s nipples to that. NOW I can die in peace.
Dear people of the interwebs (esp. ones on pictures). Giving camera a finger stopped being funny in mid-90s.
Really skinny women with fake boobs are scary.
I have a weird bump on my knuckle. I named him August.
“I love you but you have serious problem w prioritizing after 16 hour shift.” After I almost knocked him over trying to catch a stray hair.
I love driving by the jail. Makes me feel superior. It’s like “heh, you, suckas, my tattoos doesn’t have to mean anything!”
How boring! (9 tähe- ja 1 hüüumärk, 1 tühik)
No a missa loed siis! Nagu oma last õpeta…
Mul oli see-eest kavas teha osade tweetide kohta seletused, näiteks kasutan ma palju tsitaate jne.
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