selection of tweets

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Neli kuud olen nüüd Twitteris jauranud ja mõtlesin, et vaatan kõik need 2245 säutsu läbi ja kopin valiku kokku. See on rohkem mu enda jaoks, et kunagi hea lugeda, aga kui kedagi huvitab ja jaksab läbi lugeda, siis siin.

See muidu on esimene katse varbaga vett katsuda, et kuidas see blogimaailm tänapäeval ka tundub.

Used self-tanning lotion yesterday. Today: have zebra-legs.1:59 PM Feb 22nd from web

@Birxu Dude. Acting your age is so last spring.4:01 PM Feb 22nd from twhirl

Fat cat is snoring like there’s no tomorrow.7:26 PM Feb 22nd from twhirl

R. finally arrived. Now we have not only spaghettis but few pounds of frankfurters also. Planning a fast.8:58 PM Feb 22nd from twhirl

Paranoias attacking… Twitter makes me feel like I AM THE SPAM.10:07 PM Feb 22nd from twhirl

Went shopping, bought wine, drinking wine, going out soon. Cats seem to be suspicious.8:15 PM Feb 23rd from web

Istusin taksosse ja juba kodulaul käis. Vihje?9:11 PM Feb 23rd from txt

Things I want my daughter to know: please, always wash off your make-up. Always, no matter how drunk or tired you are. Always.12:13 AM Feb 24th from twhirl

My cat just tried to eat a cactus. Failed.12:43 PM Feb 24th from twhirl

From the author, Birk Rohelend: The best love is unhappy one – it doesn’t come to live with you.2:55 PM Feb 24th from twhirl

@aabram mida ma kindlasti ei oodanud, oli see jube ilmutus katrin saksi seljas. ta nägi välja nagu emo, keda on rünnanud kunstnahk.11:18 PM Feb 24th from twhirl in reply to aabram

I miss gym so much I just powerwalked to the kitchen and back.12:45 PM Feb 25th from twhirl

Cleaned EVERYthing. Even the place behind my kitchen counter where I suspect parallel universe starts. Feel like ice-cream and beer now.4:27 PM Feb 25th from twhirl

My left eye just turned blind. I CAN’T SEE!5:09 AM Feb 26th from twhirl

Oh, yeah, sorry, I forgot to open it.5:10 AM Feb 26th from twhirl

Why don’t they sell blue or red toilet paper?6:06 AM Feb 26th from twhirl

Things I should do: get dressed, start moving. Things I don’t wanna do: get dressed, start moving.3:15 PM Feb 28th from twhirl

I have red socks with ladybirds on them on today.8:00 PM Feb 28th from twhirl

Something smells like acetone. OMG. Am I leaking acetone?! Can’t find a source, but it’s killing me!7:14 PM Mar 1st from twhirl

I just discovered the source of acetone – my cheap wine smells like that. I’m not drinking that any more, thank you very much, Säästumarket.7:36 PM Mar 1st from twhirl

Ugh. So cold! Considering a new career as a bipolarbear.5:28 PM Mar 2nd from twhirl in reply to Gjerninger

I think I’m at the beginning of my menopause. At last. Hot and cold waves coming and going.1:51 PM Mar 3rd from twhirl

@Birxu And think that I’m off meds… Just discovered that nothing damages my ability to spill coffee to the keyboard though…1:58 PM Mar 3rd from twhirl in reply to Birxu

Coffee not from glass but iced coffee from tetra-pac.1:58 PM Mar 3rd from twhirl

Which I was drinking with a freaking STRAW!1:58 PM Mar 3rd from twhirl

Doing maths w/ @Birxu to figure out how much Jaegermeister we drank yesterday “to get warm”.2:02 PM Mar 3rd from twhirl

R just asked why it’s called “menopause”. Because pause indicates that it’ll be over some day.11:58 PM Mar 3rd from twhirl

Just had to set my content filter in Stumbleupon to r-rated, because one of my friends has r-rated. Things you do for friendship…7:12 PM Mar 4th from twhirl

Dead as… the Latvian money.8:56 PM Mar 5th from twhirl

Good morning, my little weasels of horror.12:46 PM Mar 6th from twhirl

I miss pillow fights with my sister. And jumping on a bed without being afraid that it’ll break.1:15 PM Mar 7th from twhirl

Orkut is filled with underage people. And I’m only trying to find one of them!7:43 PM Mar 7th from twhirl

The shroud of Turin has type AB blood stains. I have the same blood type as Jesus Christ.1:33 AM Mar 9th from twhirl

Back. Tired as a hooker after eleven-some.9:04 PM Mar 10th from twhirl

I think I should stop tweeting while intoxicated. It’s even hard for myself to understand what was I thinking while tweeting.9:01 PM Mar 12th from twhirl

TUI – tweeting under influence9:01 PM Mar 12th from twhirl

Off to bubble bath now:) Oh, such heaven is to be me sometimes.9:01 PM Mar 12th from twhirl

House: “It is kinda fun, watching you torture yourself.” Something @Birxu says to me all the time:D Laughed my ass off.11:01 PM Mar 12th from twhirl

Haah! @Birxu: “everybody wants to be me… even house.”11:04 PM Mar 12th from twhirl

I know a guy who can recite one of my books by heart. That’s spooky. And kinda fun.5:47 PM Mar 15th from twhirl

I should count one day how many “ohmygods” I experience in one day. Seems the world will never stop amaze me.7:26 PM Mar 15th from twhirl

Have I already told you that I find stretch marks sexy?7:38 PM Mar 15th from twhirl

According to Mayans world ends on 2012. I won’t even have all my loans payed back by then! Darned.8:07 PM Mar 15th from twhirl

You know what would be a weird job? Creating smileys for living.8:39 PM Mar 15th from twhirl

Cats are playing a new game – sliding on a floor with a carpet. Hilarious little bastards.8:42 PM Mar 15th from twhirl

Do you know Elvis was using toilet at the moment he died?12:27 AM Mar 16th from twhirl

@JennyDoe I now. These kinds of things are the reason why I always think while dressing: Do you want to be found dead in this underwear?12:35 AM Mar 16th from twhirl in reply to JennyDoe

Hah, I just discovered that on my Twitter photo I look like I have a beard.5:26 PM Mar 16th from twhirl

(actually, of course, it’s a shadow)5:26 PM Mar 16th from twhirl

(in case you thought I have a beard. I don’t.)5:27 PM Mar 16th from twhirl

Back from babysitting. They both were whiny and tired today. And now I’m tired. As a… something after very hard something.9:24 PM Mar 16th from twhirl

Dudes and dudettes of my house (i.e. Cusack and Miuks)! PLEASE LIGHT A MATCH!!!9:35 PM Mar 16th from twhirl

Wow, Jenna Jameson had twins. That’s… somewhat disturbing since I can imagine that happening. From conception as far as the birth itself.11:07 PM Mar 16th from twhirl

I love Lawrence Fishburne in CSI. He’s like big smart cuddly teddy-bear.11:38 PM Mar 16th from twhirl

Cusack is funny. He’s trying to walk and stretch at the same time. He looks like House.2:13 AM Mar 17th from twhirl

From CSI: “It’s the truth. Even if it never happened.”2:39 AM Mar 17th from twhirl

The same way Americans find sauerkraut weird, I find peanut butter weird. I think I’d never eat it voluntarily.1:32 AM Mar 19th from twhirl

Yes. I just managed to squirt ketchup to my kitchen ceiling.10:38 PM Mar 19th from twhirl

Bipolarity… Bipolarism…? Whatever. It’s a bitch.12:06 AM Mar 21st from twhirl

Tracy Jordan: “Sorry it took me so long to answer. I was just thinking how weird it is that we eat birds.”12:08 AM Mar 21st from twhirl

If you say that you are a designer and your webpage looks like bustyheart.com then it’s really hard to take you seriously.11:06 AM Mar 22nd from twhirl

After three long weeks of bad hair days I eventually have a good hair day. It’s a miracle!5:30 PM Mar 22nd from twhirl

RT @tinafey Somewhere a man named Barack Obama sits on a toilet and thinks the same thing I do: I need to trim my toe nails.5:45 PM Mar 22nd from twhirl

Eating pomelo for the first time. Interesting…11:29 PM Mar 22nd from twhirl

OHMYGOD! Pomelo is definitely my new favorite fruit. Grapefruits and mandarines – stay back in awe!11:39 PM Mar 22nd from twhirl

Shopped for two pomelos and two beers.5:45 PM Mar 23rd from twhirl

Things we are doing at the moment? Watching pics of shirtless Obama and Putin and talking about who will kick who’s ass.10:20 PM Mar 24th from twhirl

When I’m drunk I feel like Cow from “Cow And Chicken”. This show is hilarious!6:09 PM Mar 26th from twhirl

Miuks licked my hands while I was sleeping. The only logical conclusion is that she’s planning to eat me.3:09 PM Mar 28th from twhirl

@Birxu: “Have you seen flying dick?” Me: “…” @Birxu: “Sorry, I’m on random mode.”4:06 PM Mar 28th from twhirl

Why do people think that when they cross their fingers while saying something that doesn’t count?4:59 PM Mar 28th from twhirl

My bf is a total nerd. He just said: “Physics is cool.” After I tried to explain him about Rayleigh scattering.8:16 PM Mar 28th from twhirl

Which means I’m a nerd too. I’m trying to understand why sky and veins are blue.8:16 PM Mar 28th from twhir

Trying to write. Story needs some new twists and I’m out of ideas. @Birxu suggested using theme “yoga fart”. Will consider.10:17 PM Mar 29th from twhirl

One of our favorite quotes at home is: “You’re mixing real life with porn again.”9:41 PM Mar 30th from twhirl

Really hard to explain to a 3yo why i need Evra patches. She tries to take it off so i’d have a baby. Like – instantly. To her to play w/.5:38 PM Mar 31st from txt

Bought a quacking mug. Scared the hell out of sales-lady.5:03 PM Apr 3rd from twhirl

I sometimes wonder if sex feels different for other people.2:57 AM Apr 5th from twhirl

Just got weirdest spam:”Principles will help have the resources, hear if you would.”8:25 PM Apr 8th from twhirl

I found a paper between the pages of Jerome K. Jerome where I had written a long time ago: “I can handle bees!” I wonder what does it mean.1:14 PM Apr 9th from twhirl

QOTD: I’m different than other women. And by different, I mean better.3:53 PM Apr 9th from twhirl

Me: “Who’s singing?” R: “U2.” Me: “Youtube?” R: “U2.” Me: “Youtube? Seriously?!”6:31 PM Apr 10th from twhirl

Someone should make a band called Youtube.6:31 PM Apr 10th from twhirl

Teate, millest ma surmani tüdinenud olen? Peeter Ojast ja tema ülbitsemisest.8:52 PM Apr 12th from twhirl

Woke up to drilling and sawing. Swearing and spitting got up. Drilling and sawing stopped. Story of my life.1:36 PM Apr 14th from twhirl

Woke up to complete silence. Thought for a few seconds that I’m all alone in the world.1:18 PM Apr 15th from twhirl

Drove again w/ an empty gas tank to get some props from store for tonight’s game night. This shiz is going to end w/ a brain aneurysm.9:09 PM Apr 17th from twhirl

And by “game night” I mean drinking.9:10 PM Apr 17th from twhirl

But in general: ouch.3:21 PM Apr 19th from twhirl

I’m eating sausages. Oh I’m so going to Dieters Hell for this.11:00 PM Apr 21st from twhirl

Doesn’t Jessica Fletcher ever wonder why she’s attracting so many murders? And does she feel guilty about it?1:07 AM Apr 22nd from twhirl

Our hallway smelled so very nice like roses had barfed out some daffodils.3:50 PM Apr 27th from twhirl

Am I even allowed to say the word “faboosh” or is it reserved for gays only?1:38 PM Apr 28th from twhirl

QOTD. 13 (from House): Being drunk doesn’t change who you are, it just reveals it.2:44 PM Apr 30th from twhirl

I wonder if Lady Gaga has friends that will one time just laugh and ask: “What the hell are you wearing, girl?!”8:29 PM May 1st from twhirl

B was just here and mocked my picture on a name tag. Apparently I have extremely dead eyes on the picture.3:27 PM May 2nd from web

“This is weird. Something good is happening.” – “Take a deep breath, I’m sure it’ll pass.” Bones. Classic.12:10 AM May 8th from TwitterFox

Got my new ID-card yesterday. I haven’t heard my friends laughing so hard for a while now. It seems I look like a corpse on that photo.4:25 AM May 8th from TwitterFox

I just realized I don’t like forks. I really, really don’t like forks. Maybe there’s an Internet support group I can join.6:09 AM May 10th from twhirl

I drove home and I think I saw a drag queen. When you’d live where I live you’d understand that’s really weird.8:39 AM May 10th from twhirl

Miuks sometimes has a creepy lazy left eye like Paris Hilton does.10:21 PM May 10th from twhirl

RT @god: BTW, What would Jesus tweet? “About to get nailed to this cross bc @pontius being a dick. Wait till he sees me resurrect LOL!”1:27 AM May 14th from twhirl

It’s really hard for me to accept the concept “your life is happening now”. I just can’t believe it will not get better.4:05 AM May 16th from twhirl

“i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.” – http://is.gd/u9LT5:01 AM May 16th from twhirl

I think I can send my laptop to restart with bare powers of my mind.5:10 PM May 17th from twhirl

I would really like to see id-pictures of supermodels. I bet they look as horrendous as do we, the little people.11:29 PM May 19th from twhirl

Wow. I just got an e-mail from Dormeo who apparently wants to sleep with me. I’ll stick to humans, but thanks for offering…. mattress.11:39 PM May 19th from twhirl

So yeah. Sleeping is definitely my thing and beloved hobby.3:59 PM May 24th from twhirl

Note to self: don’t try to wash windows when winds are resembling hurricane Katrina.4:48 PM May 24th from twhirl

I have strange melancholy-connection with an ice-cream spoon.9:02 PM May 24th from twhirl

I just realized something. I’ve never seen Estonian porn. Huh.10:47 PM May 24th from twhirl

Wow, I’m listening to country music. And there’s no gun pointed at my face or anything.9:28 PM May 26th from twhirl

I just saw one hedgehog screaming at the other. Well, that’s one thing to scratch off my Bucket List.1:26 AM May 27th from twhirl

My main problem is that I think that I’m cool. Actually I’m pretty uncool. Kinda like mullets.6:16 PM May 27th from twhirl

New emoticon: 69 |D_O – i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently (http://is.gd/Heqo)9:25 PM May 27th from twhirl

“You just lost you mom. It’s only natural you are so Elmo.” – “Emo.” – “That’s not a word, sweety.” #dollhouse10:21 PM May 27th from twhirl

It’s like my uterus knew I just bought two pregnancy tests yesterday. It was all like: “Let’s show her, girls! SPARTA!!!”11:04 PM May 27th from twhirl

RT @sween: And behind every great woman is a great ninja. Of course you can’t see the ninja. That’s why he’s *great*. Try to keep up, people3:09 PM May 28th from twhirl

There comes a point in every woman’s life when she has to decide: shall I wash my hair today or can I wait till tomorrow?3:49 PM May 28th from twhirl

Ohhoo, Eesti passidele lisanduvad sõrmejäljed. Huvitav, mitu kuritegu nii lahendatud saaks, kui politsei KMAga koostööd hakkaks tegema?6:08 AM May 29th from twhirl

My today’s horoscopes are making me laugh: “a walking reservoir of ideas”? More like walking reservoir of unsolved anger issues.6:17 AM May 29th from twhirl

Today’s newspaper anecdotes, on the other hand, are not making me laugh. They never do. Valdo Jahilo and I are such different people.6:18 AM May 29th from twhirl

Sometimes I think I’d like my milkshake to bring all the boys to the yard. But then again I’d like them to be here for my great personality.9:08 AM May 29th from twhirl

Security cam update: just saw a running midget.11:04 AM May 30th from twhirl

Nice. Just got an e-mail from my bbf with a subject “Booobies”.4:20 PM May 30th from twhirl

If something happened and I ended up in a wheelchair I would tell my home bar to install inclined plane so I could still go to drink there.10:29 PM May 31st from web

Is it bad to use work computer to search the term “reflectoporn”? I’m asking for me.11:03 PM May 31st from web

Seems I’m wallowing so deep in my misery that I don’t have anything witty to say today. Mr T. So here, I tried.11:48 PM Jun 3rd from twhirl

Booty call? – Dude. You don’t even follow my Twitter. (http://bit.ly/3cFZZ11:02 PM Jun 4th from twhirl

R asked me yesterday, annoyed: “What happened to your attention span?” I was ashamed to answer: “Twitter…”6:23 PM Jun 5th from twhirl

When someone says in all seriousness “Do not visit this site”, don’t you just wanna, you know, visit the site?10:42 AM Jun 7th from twhirl

I take great comfort in knowing that my lady-parts look better than Lindsay Lohans.12:34 PM Jun 7th from twhirl

You know who I absolutely do not care about? Speidi.6:53 PM Jun 9th from TwitterFox

Me: “What do you want for your b-day?” Him: “Well, new boots are kind of out of question…”6:59 PM Jun 9th from TwitterFox

“You look like Jesus and Patrick Dempsey had a child and that child grew older and then got really sick.” (Royal Pains)7:38 PM Jun 11th from twhirl

Dirty texting loses its charm when Mom textes you in between.10:12 PM Jun 11th from twhirl

I just changed my MSN display name to “JOUJOU OLEN DAKI”. Yes, I am retarded.11:42 PM Jun 12th from TwitterFox

Cristiano Ronaldo hooked up with Paris Hilton? I’m a) horrified and disappointed, b) surprised he’s not gay.12:11 AM Jun 13th from TwitterFox

Fun from spam folder: “I Love you!:) Don’t forget to confirm.” Confirmed, I love you, too.5:38 AM Jun 13th from TwitterFox

Things discussed right now via MSN with my bf: “why some men like asses, and other like boobs. The theory.”11:36 AM Jun 14th from web

Is it weird that ppl who bought stethoscope on Amazon also bought Dexter dvds and nurse scissors? Is it… serial killer w medical fetish?12:57 PM Jun 14th from TwitterFox

I can’t say this enough. I hate when men mosh. It is not sexy at all.1:06 PM Jun 14th from TwitterFox

How is hangover in Irish? Morning.2:43 PM Jun 14th from TwitterFox

I asked that my bf would start calling me Peanut ‘cause FB test said so. And now he does. Adorable.4:54 PM Jun 14th from TwitterFox

Went to kitchen, came back, and was startled ‘cause I had already forgotten I rearranged the bedroom yesterday.8:51 PM Jun 14th from twhirl

Talking to my bf about the possibility of organizing a wet t-shirt competition at home. I have one condition: I should win.10:35 PM Jun 15th from TwitterFox

I actually pondered for a while is it humans or humen. Facepalm, that’s what it is.12:02 AM Jun 16th from TwitterFox

I feel like I’ve gained like 20 pounds since… yesterday.1:19 AM Jun 16th from TwitterFox

If you think about it, House is a really weird last name. Almost like Lamp.3:01 AM Jun 16th from TwitterFox

When FB says I have “1 other request” I automatically think it’s a request to ran naked over a bridge screaming: “Spartaaaaa!”4:44 AM Jun 16th from TwitterFox

They should name anecdote section in paper anekJokes, since they’re mocking the word anecdote.7:15 AM Jun 16th from TwitterFox

Näitab prioriteete. Postimehe esikaas: liuväli raeplatsil, EPLi esikaas: hukkunud sõdur Afganistanis. I say, fail, Postimees.7:18 AM Jun 16th from TwitterFox

This is my computer free day. See, it’s going pretty well!7:36 PM Jun 16th from TwitterFox

Now that I’ve seen Dolph Lundgren’s penis, my life is complete. I can die in peace.10:03 PM Jun 18th from TwitterFox

Oh, no, wait. Add Tori Spelling’s nipples to that. NOW I can die in peace.10:03 PM Jun 18th from TwitterFox

Dear people of the interwebs (esp. ones on pictures). Giving camera a finger stopped being funny in mid-90s.7:46 AM Jun 19th from web

Really skinny women with fake boobs are scary.7:57 AM Jun 19th from web

I have a weird bump on my knuckle. I named him August.8:59 AM Jun 19th from twhirl

“I love you but you have serious problem w prioritizing after 16 hour shift.” After I almost knocked him over trying to catch a stray hair.9:01 AM Jun 19th from twhirl

I love driving by the jail. Makes me feel superior. It’s like “heh, you, suckas, my tattoos doesn’t have to mean anything!”7:44 PM Jun 20th from twhirl

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